Thursday, January 14, 2010

I want some cheese with my whine

Really? Am I really (really) that disconnected from every other human being? I'd say from all the other human beings on the face of the planet, but you have to account for those guys up in the space station, too.

When you wanted quiet and focus in the office, I wanted to fidget with anything, with everything, on your desk.

When you wanted to go out for mid-afternoon ice cream all I wanted to do was work on the project and get it done already.

When you were driving home from work with your fiance I was sitting in my office weeping ugly tears alone.

When you were talking about the Rain Man I wanted to talk about Fahrenheit 451, but I didn't.

When you were talking about autism and social cues and stemming I wanted to bring up Oprah neurons, but I didn't.

When you wanted to sing that Celine Dion/Barbara Streisand duet I wanted to bray like a donkey, and then maybe sing an Irish drinking song instead.

When you brought up the Age of Innocence I almost told you about A Room With a View and Where Angels Fear to Tread, but you changed the subject too fast.

When you were talking about your sweet husband and your sweet son and your exciting pregnancy all I could think about was how you smelled like hair products and how I never smell like that and how maybe you always smell that way. Maybe all normal women smell that way and that's maybe why I'm not married with a son and a pregnancy of my own, is because the men can smell that my hair isn't styled and therefore my hair (and the rest of me, by default) is unmarriageable.

How can everyone else in the world just live their lives like normal when I alone am so put upon? How?

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Favorite Moments in 2009

  • Making it through the first year at my job. Not only did I not get fired during the first year, but I also didn't quit! I think that's a hurrah.
  • Making my first cheese. It was a cheddar.
  • We made the move back from an apartment to a house. With a backyard! Putting up the Christmas lights on our house made me happy.
  • Traveling with my friend Cammie. I keep needing to pinch myself to remember that this most fabulous of women is actually my friend. San Diego, Los Angeles, Barcelona, Madrid, Lisbon.
  • Seeing Ira Glass. I felt kind of grownup, paying to see a man tell stories I could've just listened to on the radio for free. I liked it.
  • Hurrah, two weeks with Krista.
  • I can overcome physical challenges! 80 miles on a bike, 14 miles on a hike. Maybe in 2010 I will learn to overcome these challenges with some shred of grace and dignity. Bring it on, 2010!