Tuesday, October 17, 2006


I had a job interview today. To get the full effect of the day, we will have to backtrack to this morning, when I was asking Uffish what I should wear. Our conversation went something like this:

Me: What should I wear to my interview today?
Uffish: A nice shirt and a nice skirt.
Me: (whining) But I ride my bike to school. How on earth can I get around this insurmountable obstacle?
Uffish: Um, suck it up and take a skirt with you in your backpack? (Or, you could just go naked. Whatever.)
Me: Oh, that'd probably work.

I went about my morning, getting dressed, finding a nice skirt and nice shirt (I even ironed them!), switching my backpack stuff from my normal backpack to my messenger bag so I wouldn't get back sweat all over my nice ironed shirt while riding my bike.

I went to my class, and enjoyed the hour and fifteen minute lecture on why Westerners create monsters that are mixes of people and animals (think werewolves. Or Superman) while Easterners create monsters that are their own things (think dragons and Digimon). It has to do with society (surprise! It's a sociology class), and reincarnation.

After class I went into the bathroom and laughed at myself because we had just been talking about Superman and here I was in the bathroom stall changing clothes. I reapplied makeup and straightened everything so I'd be presentable, then walked across campus with my bike over to the building where the interview was. I went inside, had a fairly nerve-wracking interview (four people interviewing me at the same time! For a stupid office job!) that I think I did alright on (?), thanked the nice ladies, and left. I went into a nearby building to switch back into Clark Kent, strode (strided?) into the handicapped stall where there's a big full-length mirror, reached down and....

Gasp! Where did the zipper on my skirt go? It's disappeared! Oh wait, phew, it's right here in the back.

Gasp. The zipper was in the back. The skirt was made to have the zipper in the front. It must have gradually turned around as I was walking across campus with that stupid messenger bag on my hip. I had sat through an entire interview with my Skirt. On. Backwards.

This is why I shouldn't ever think that my day is going alright, because I'm really walking around with my skirt backwards without even knowing it. Think of all the other things I never realize that are quietly working against me and making me look a fool. I shouldn't even get out of bed in the morning. I should just lie there, twentyfour hours a day, contemplating my complete moronity.

Really, I'm not that worried about it. As my roommate said, perhaps the potential employers will remember me better because of it: "I really liked that girl with the backwards skirt- she seemed really on the ball. It shows that she's very focused."

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