Thursday, July 13, 2006

Ah, but do you care what I refrained from getting for dessert?

After spending the past few days at the Grand Canyon, I feel the need to share some of my observations with you, the internet.

-It may not occur to you, but the Grand Canyon is in fact, a big hole in the ground in the middle of the desert. If you stand on the edge and take pictures of it all day, you will end up sunburnt. If you wear pigtails while taking pictures all day, you will end up with a sunburnt scalp which will flake off over the next few days in a painful and ugly way.

-It is nearly impossible to take an interesting picture of the canyon, because every angle you can get of it has already been gotten a million times before by Japanese people in tour buses. Your only hope is to get a really great sunset or lightning shot, because the sunset and lightning are the only things about the canyon that actually change.

-When the hotel boasts "modern rooms with vaulted ceilings," it means the roof does come to a very obtuse point, and you get a TV, two lamps and a bathroom. Modern!

-The fact that there are exactly three restaurants in the actual park leads the Bright Angel Lodge to believe it is safe in naming a dessert "Warm Apple Grunt." I know that my favorite dessert is the Tepid Blueberry Howl, not to mention the delights of the Cool Watermelon Snort.


Anonymous said...

the finger on the lens is a truely classy addition to what i would normally call a cliche canyon pic.

cool watermelon snort.
i grunted.

ViolaSaint said...

Yes, I feel that the finger creates drama, a focal point that draws the eye away from the vast unknown and makes the viewer contemplate his own humanity. Also known as, "I didn't even see the finger until you pointed it out."

Anonymous said...

Wow, that's the safest I've ever felt looking at a canyon view. No leg spasms, even.