A Shockingly Serious Post

A girl at my university killed herself last week. I read it in the campus newspaper, that she hung herself in her dorm, just after the first week of classes.

I'm not sure how to react to this news. My first reaction is to say, "so? I don't know her, I don't live in her dorm, this doesn't affect me, so what's to react to?" Then I feel a little guilty because no man is an island and all that, and because sheesh, have I no sympathy at all? This guilt is fleeting, though, and leaves me in search of something else to think about this situation.

Overall, I'm just confused when I hear stories like this. What's to die for? You're a college student, you've got friends and classes to go to and maybe your life isn't perfect, but whose life is? I can kind of understand a person wanting to end it all because they've gone bankrupt and want their wife and five children to have the life insurance money or something like that. But what is there for a young, vital person to kill themself for?

I know, I've read Suicide and know all about anomie and the feeling of disconnectedness that occurs around the late teens and early twenties. But hey, I've been in a state of anomie before, and all it did for me was make me feel like my head was a little floaty and I was more distractable by pretty colors and shiny objects for a while. If anything it made me stick to my schedule more because I didn't really have the creativity or willpower to do anything I hadn't done before. But maybe different people are affected differently? I'm not sure. I sure am sorry for that girl, though. She had so much to look forward to, so much left to do with her life, and now she can't. I'll see if I can do anything extraordinary for her today, since she can't. This weekend I will celebrate my life.

Kids These Days

I don't know what my problem is, but recently I've been talking less and less like a normal human being, and more and more like a crotchety old woman who is indignant at the whole world.

This week marked the beginning of the semester, and as such we had numerous concourses of freshmen in and out of the doors of our office, trying to see advisors RIGHT THIS SECOND because their little scheduling problems are the most urgent issues facing the world of today. Part of my annoyance is due to the complete lack of respect they show for everyone they encounter, and another part is due to the fact that none of their stories are unique. I've listened to the same story over and over today, maybe a hundred and fifty times today. I'm going to listen to it again a hundred and fifty times tomorrow, and then again the day after another hundred times. Perhaps by Friday the sob story of not having the exact classes I want will lessen to about fifty, but that may be wishful thinking.

I wonder if this is how nurses feel at the end of the day, or lifeguards. Sheesh, here I have to go save another life, because another person did the exact same stupid thing that I've been telling people not to do all day long. And then after saving countless lives with little to no thanks (because it's your *job* to do that), you just can't get to one in time because you're busy saving somebody else, and then the dying one gets all mad at you, like come on, man, where were you? Why weren't you there to coddle me and save me when I did something stupid?

Or they yell. I get that a lot these days, too.

Ah, Wedded Bliss

The wedding was a happy occaision, the bringing together of two very silly families. It was very entertaining, knowing both families, to see them all meet for the first time, and guess what was going through their heads about their new in-laws.

While my hair did not beautify itself during the night, I was able to wrangle it into shampoo-commercial hair, all smooth and wavy and kind of elegant looking, if I do say so myself. I ended up making the 1.5 hour drive to the wedding site with the groom and his groomsmen, who were his old buddies from elementary school days (???). They've grown in slightly different directions during the past few years, though, which was good for me. While the groom is, as the bride puts it, a "loveable dork," the groomsmen are pretty cool and hilariously funny. We spent most of the time joking and laughing and having as grand a time as you can have in tuxes and a bridesmaid dress in 105 degree weather. I also helped them decorate the getaway car (are bridesmaids allowed to do that?), adding serifs where necessary to make their manly handwriting more readable. Little hearts and foofy borders around the "Just Married" were also left up to me. The bride and groom drove merrily away, probably glad to be rid of their micromanaging mothers (both of them! such bad luck) for the week.


About two hours after that reception ended, the one for my roommate began on the other side of town. That one was an absolute joy, as I was only a guest, and could come and go (and eat delicious wedding food) as I wished. Hers was a little more fancy and formal, which was appreciated after the chaos of all the family members earlier in the day. The happy couple looked very sharp, and more happy and relaxed than I've seen either of them for several months now. There apparently was a bouquet toss, but I had snuck out early, ready for some pajama time at home.

Ahoy

Sigh, two weddings this weekend, and important as they are I almost wish I could ditch them and sit by the pool for two days instead.

What was my friend thinking, asking me to be a bridesmaid? I don't have a bridesmaid body, and I absolutely do not have bridesmaid hair. Being the smart person I am, I decided to begin experimenting with hairstyles an entire 12 hours before I'm expected to be ready at arms. Hopefully some miracle will occur in the night and I will awaken perfectly coiffed in the morning.

Meanwhile our kitchen is slowly filling to the brim with little tubes wrapped in ribbon, the favors for my roommate's wedding, which will eventually (by tomorrow evening) be filled with... almonds? m&m's? I'm not really sure how that's all going to work out, but I did tie fifty little bows onto fifty little lids this afternoon. Fifty painstaking bows out of wire ribbon.

I'm very much looking forward to the beginning of the school semester.